Today I finally finished my PhD thesis. I got an email from Kim saying:
Hi Nathan, I have skimmed through your changes and I am very happy with the thesis apart from the following small changes. I don't need to see it again--please make the changes and get your Dad to print and softbind the copies for submission this week! You should be proud of your thesis it is first rate and reflects considerable knowledge of digital typography. I would be extremely surprised if it doesn't get through with only minor revisions. Have a thesis-free Christmas for the first time in nearly 10 years Kim
So I made those changes, along with some further minor corrections from mental. (technically it was just 8 christmases, but at this point, who's counting)
Of course, having done that I have to fill out all the special forms. Remotely.
My favourite question was "Reason why it was not possible to submit the thesis by the due date:"
My answer was "Because I'm a slow writer.", but I do wonder exactly what one could be expected to write when a PhD is 4 years past the cutoff. Mark suggested "The dog ate it.". Perhaps "Because I'm a no hope slacker who can't even finish a PhD on time.". Or "The world was not ready for the ideas."
I think the truth is simply "I'm a lazy perfectionist and could never be motivated to work on it, except when I did, I had 10 new ideas which I absolutely had to research carefully."
Anyway, it's done. Now it has to go off into the big scary world of external examiners, and run the gauntlet of red tape, black gowns and boofy hats.